It has been a long radio silence here in my world.
I have been sick. My wife has been sick. My herbs have been sick.
It has also started raining again. Which means my body does it's little falling apart thing again because it thinks the sun has died.
Oh well, I reckon I can't have it all good in one great big gulp.
Life has it's ups and downs and somewhere along the road you realise, or at least need to realise, that you are alive. The sun shines on you one day and the next the rains soaks you through so that you look like a soggy kitten. All sad and lonely.
All it really takes is a warm hug, kiss and cuddle, and sometimes a good nights rest as well and the world takes it's ugly mask off and looks like it can be your friend again.
It all boils down to perspective. Frame of mind or paradigm as some people call it...
Life is at the brink of changing in a huge way it the near future. Or it might not. But the possibility of change, for the better, is like warm sunshine in these soggy grey days.
There are a few great fears, and dangers with the decisions that need to be made. But like every great hunter that has gone before me, fear either kills or drives forward.
And that fear is the thing that needs to get sat down on a chair in a bright light and looked at from every corner until it becomes so well known that it loses it's power to intimidate. That happens because once every crevass and dark cranny are known and mapped, a journey can be taken in confidence. Quite simply because if you wander off the path you can simply change direction and still reach your destination, along a more scenic route if you wish.
So to make a life changing decision with all it's pitfalls and hopes, is something that gets done ever so carefully so that every potential possibility gets evaluated and measured.
That way I can decide and know that whatever may happen after the decision I am at least mentally prepared for the consequences and challenges afterwards.
Sick or well.
Warm or wet.
It all looks the same in the end.
Take a look at my options, weigh up the pro's and con's, and either walk away or take the challenge.
That's what life is about in the end isn't it. It's how you get to know you're alive.